The Whole Brain Child Book Summary

Book Summary

15 min

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Brief Summary

While our brains are the most complex organ we have, we can use our biology to our advantage, especially when it comes to parenting. By applying tested strategies (such as name it to tame it and connect and redirect) to our children’s behaviors, we can begin to see our children--and their brains--through a wider lens.

No longer are temper tantrums simply signs of an overtired kid. They are actually indicative of the brain’s primitive functionality and speak to a child’s lack of rational cognitive development.

No longer are children (and adults) right-brained or left-brained. Instead, in The Whole Brain Child, Dr. Dan Siegel demonstrates exactly how it is possible to place equal value on both hemispheres. There are strengths and weaknesses associated with each.

In order to best raise our children, we must leverage both sides of the brain in our own lives, too.

About the Author

Dr. Dan Siegel was born in 1957. He is a trained clinical psychiatrist, author, and professor of psychiatry who teaches at the UCLA School of Medicine, where he is also the executive director of Mindsight Institute. After receiving his medical degree from Harvard Medical School and training in pediatrics as well as psychiatry, Dr. Siegel went on to study attachment, autobiographical memory, and emotions and behavior. Throughout his career, Dr. Siegel has published multiple articles, book chapters, and other texts. His most recent book, Aware: The Science and Practice of Presence, was released in 2018.

Topics

Parenting

The Whole Brain Child Book Summary Preview

Key Insights

Much like our own, our children's brains are composed of many intertwining parts, each of which serves a unique function in day-to-day life. While we often think, talk, and listen without recognizing the particular areas of our minds that are being stimulated, a general awareness of brain biology and cognitive psychology can offer key insights into not only our own lives but the lives of our children, too. As parents, it is our responsibility to ensure that our offspring utilize their brains to the fullest extent possible in order to succeed in a challenging world.

Raising Healthy Kids

Due to the predominance of social media, new parents are bombarded with advice from every possible source. If it isn’t sustainable parenting groups on Facebook or blogs to show off and share your progeny, it is books that are chock-full of advice for raising the modern child. Not to mention all of the unsolicited suggestions you are receiving from your friends and family who have “been through it before”, no doubt.

So, how do we filter out the critical information and separate that from the noise?

It all comes down to nurturing your child’s brain.

And, in order to do this, you must be willing to nurture your own brain first. Children emulate their parents.

So, using the whole brain? It starts with you.

Brain Biology

The human brain is made up of two hemispheres. The left hemisphere develops more slowly than the right hemisphere and it is responsible for both language and logic. The right hemisphere, on the other hand, develops quickly and allows for the development of nonverbal signals, images, and feelings.

Until a child is three years old (roughly), he or she is right brain-dominant.

Do you ever find yourself trapped in a circular argument with your two years old who is unable to distinguish right from wrong?

This is because the child is unable to see logic and rationality. Reasoning skills come with left-brain development, a process that takes place later on in childhood.

Once your child’s brain hemispheres have both fully evolved, it is important that you teach your child not to rely too heavily on one side at the expense of the other.

But how?

Here are two strategies:

The first strategy is referred to as connect and redirect. Essentially, when your child is having an emotional outburst, engage your empathy skills to calm his or her right brain. Then, redirect the child to the logical left brain by catering specifically to his or her ability to reason.

Consider the following example.

Your child is terrified of dogs.

When she sees a dog and begins screaming, ignore the urge to yell at her for being scared. Instead, take the time to put yourself in your child’s head--the fear of dogs obviously feels rational to her. Once you have empathized with your child and calmed her down by lowering your voice slightly and acknowledging the validity of her fears, work on channeling a logical perspective into your child’s mind. For instance, you could talk about the fact that while you always want to ask the...